How many times have you heard “If you can’t take care of yourself, then you can’t take care of others.” A million times, right? This is so significant in my life that I even manage to take care of myself while facilitating sessions.
I wouldn’t say I’ve mastered it yet, but my self-care practice has evolved tremendously in the past 5 years. These suggestions come from my own experience and the experiences of some colleagues with whom I’ve spoken about the topic.
Self-care is the act of maintaining personal wellness (physically, emotionally, cognitively, spiritually, and socially) that allows one to function at his/her most optimal level during daily activities.
The American Music Therapy Assoc. Professional Competency 14.1 reads: “Recognize the impact of one’s own feeling, attitudes, and actions on the client and the therapy process” (AMTA 2009). I further believe that it is the responsibility of the therapist to refer the client to another professional if the therapist is not healthy enough to provide service.
In the Drum Call with Christine Stevens, I stated that “If you come home from work and you are exhausted, too tired to make dinner, too tired to exercise, then something is out of balance in your practice.” In my opinion, the therapist should feel an even exchange of energy. And it’s the therapist’s responsibility to regulate his/her own energy exchange during the day.
Here are 8 ethically-sound ways to take care of yourself during the day:
1. Check in with yourself. When you do a check in with your client(s) (e.g. hello song, drum greeting, first deep breaths), also check in with yourself silently. If you find you need a deep breath, then facilitate a few deep breaths for your client(s), too. If your leg is stiff, then work in a gentle leg stretch in the session (if it flows with the rest of the session). Better yet, come to the session centered, grounded, and prepared. If need be, start the session late so that you can take a moment for yourself beforehand.
2. Watch your body position. When I first heard of the Floortime approach for treating kids with autism, my initial thought was “Oh the poor therapist will have to spend all sorts of uncomfortable time on the floor!” I learned more about the approach, and it is possible for the therapist/parent to be comfortable while engaging in this approach. Music therapist Cami Smith of Rhythmic Minds knows the importance of ergonomics from experience. From years of working on the floor with kids with special needs, Cami occasionally suffered from inflammation of one of the sacroiliac joints. Now Cami recommends using discs and wedges to support proper ergonomics when working on the floor.
3. Notice how long you sit in the car. I ran into someone in the coffee shop the other day who told me of her chronic sciatica. She’s in great physical shape otherwise. She blames the sciatica on a decade or two of driving 400 miles per week for work. This made my ears perk up. Sometimes I drive over 400 miles per week! One of my professional goals for the next year is to minimize driving time.
4. Notice the volume and usage of your voice. Do you ever have to yell over drums? Do you ever grumble your voice for effect? If you sing, how is your singing technique? If you are experiencing pain in your throat, then see an ENT doctor immediately to check for vocal nodes. I’ve had to take a month off work before just to let my voice rest, and it was worth it!
5. Lighten the load of physical exertion. Decide whether it’s necessary to expend as much energy as you do. Tone it down and see what happens. Start conserving more energy than you exert during a session, and notice how you feel afterward. Also notice if your clients actually benefit from your exertion. In my experience, they more than often do not.
6. Lighten the load of emotional exertion. Go into the session simply as an observer. Give yourself an emotional break for a change during the session and don’t take on emotional burdens. Realize where and how you get inspiration from your work, and practice focusing attention on your inspiration.
7. Take time for your own creative expression. You’re making music, improvising with clients, song-writing with clients, providing a healing space for clients, and more. Do this for yourself, too, in your own time or with friends.
8. Financial health is also part of self-care. Make sure you are getting paid an honorable salary for your services. Otherwise, burnout happens quickly! Nothing is worse than going into a session with resentment for not being able to afford the gas it takes to get there. A few weeks ago on Twitter, I shared the spreadsheet I use to calculate net earnings per session after taking into account travel time, gas mileage, tax estimates, length of session, etc. If you’d like a free copy, send me an email at Kat@SoundHealthMusic.com.
A blog post could be written on each one of these and expanded upon! But this is a great start. The general idea I have is that it is impossible to give your client the absolute best possible service if you (the service provider) are not well. What do you think?
Be well, feel good, and make music!
Photo courtesy of Max Vuong.
Hi Kat,
I would love a copy of the spreadsheet! Nice article…something I think about often but struggle with consistency.
Hope you are well!
Barb
Hi Barb! This topic is especially hot in your field of massage therapy! Thanks for your comment, and the spreadsheet is on the way. Great to hear from you!
Wow Kat, thanks for the great post! I was just telling my husband last night about how tired I have felt lately trying to balance work, grad school, house-hunting, etc. For reasons beyond my control, I have ended up with 2 week days off per week, which now is great as I will use them as much-needed rest/study time. I would also love a copy of the spreadsheet!
Thanks again!
Justine
Oooo, Justine. Sounds like whatever is “beyond your control” has brought forth some wisdom into the self-care aspect of your life. That’s GREAT! Happens to me, too! Spreadsheet on the way.
Such a great article, made me re-examine a few components of my practice!
Thanks for your comment, Ann Marie. And I hear ya, I feel like I’m constantly re-examining! Warm wishes~
Hi Kat,
What a great post! I always think of “self-care” as getting enough sleep, eating properly, exercising, hobbies, etc., but you bring up some aspects of self-care that I’d never considered. Thanks for posting!
Hi Stephanie, Thanks for your comment! And here I almost forgot about sleep and eating properly. Self-care is a full time job! =)
I agree with Stephanie… you’ve brought up other aspects of self care that I haven’t thought of before. I have rule for myself that helps me stay balanced during the day— Always have lunch and NO WORKING during lunch. (Twitter and FB is ok though)
Hi Michelle, Thanks for the comment! Agreed: Rules and boundaries are always good to follow.
How times, Kat! I had a super crappy start to my day, and it just went on and kept getting even more annoying. Argh! One of the groups I work with asked if we could just hang out and sing together, and I thought to myself, “you know what? That sounds like a good idea.” It put me in a better frame of mind, and I was able to carry on and be way more present to my clients for the rest of the day. Truly a crucial topic! Nice suggestions!
Oops. Tired. That was supposed to be “How time-ly” not “How times”. Oy. Did I mention it was a crappy day?
Hey There Kat! I missed you at the DCF-Conference….hope you had a great time! Just came across this particular article of yours…a very timely thing for me to read just now….I’ve NOT been taking good care of myself these last many months (almost a good year now, actually! DAMN, time does indeed fly!) Last summer was a wonderful summer full of drumming and growth and training – as a coincidence of doing many types of gigs that I have previously avoided for fear of not knowing quite how to play with them….I’d gotten into a great groove of doing the sorts of gigs that I’ve done and so could do those very well and easily.
Was good to be stretched out of my comfort zone. This coming spring and summer season is shaping up to be ABSOLUTELY the busiest season in my DCF career of 5 years. VERY VERY exciting! But I have to take better care of myself to properly enjoy it and to gift the best of me to the communities that I will serve.
So to close this much longer that I’d intended response to your blog-post, THANK YOU for your great comments on self-care…They go a long way towards helping me to heal that part of my self-care (self-love) that I’ve let fall asleep (at the drum – as it were!)
Peace,
Otha
Yay for self-love, Otha! Glad this helped you!
Forgot to say that, if still available, I would LOVE a copy of that spread sheet.
Be Well!
Otha
Ok! I’ll email it to you =)